What makes a great parent?
A good parent is a person who strives to make decisions in the most effective interest of the child.
What can make a great parent is not only identified by the parent 's actions, but also the intention of theirs.
A great parent doesn't need to be perfect. Nobody is perfect. No child is perfect either … keeping this in your mind is important when we set the expectations of ours.
Successful parenting isn't about achieving perfection. Though it doesn't imply that we shouldn't work towards that goal. Set very high standards for ourselves first and then the children of ours next. We serve as role models that are important for them.
Top Ten Parenting Tips
Here are 10 tips that will help you be an even better parent, learn effective parenting skills, and avoid bad parenting.
Some people are not simple or quick.
And most likely nobody is capable of doing them constantly.
While you may not always do all of these things, though the ideas in this parenting guide will help you move in the right direction.
#1 BE An excellent Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Do not simply tell the child of yours everything you want them to do.
The most effective way to teach is showing them.
Human is a special species in part because we are able to learn by imitation. We're programmed to imitate others' actions, comprehend them, and integrate them in to our own. Children, in particular, watch everything the parents of theirs do very thoroughly.
Thus, function as the person you want your child to be - respect your child, demonstrate to them good attitude and behavior, have empathy towards your kid's emotion - as well as your child will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show them Through ACTION
Show the love of yours.
There's simply no such thing as loving your child too much. To love them can't spoil them.
Only what you choose to do (or give) in the name of love may - things as material indulgence, low expectation, leniency, and over-protection. When these items are provided in place of real love, that's when you will have a spoiled kid.
Loving your child can be as easy as offering them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and listening to your kid's problems seriously.
Showing these acts of love can cause the release of feel-good hormones such as oxytocin. These neurochemicals are able to bring us a deep feeling of contentment, emotional warmth, and calm; from these, the child, will develop resilience and also not to point out a closer connection with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Babies are born with around hundred billion brain cells (neurons) with relatively few connections. These connections create our thoughts, drive the actions of ours, shape our personalities, and basically determine who we're. They are created, strengthened, and "sculpted" through life experiences.
Give the child of yours positive family interaction, especially in the beginning years. They will then be equipped to see positive experiences themselves and also provide them to others.
But if you give your child bad experiences, they will not have the kind of development needed for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Have a tickle marathon. Go on the park. Laugh with your child. Allow them to have positive attention. Drive through an emotional tantrum with them. Solve an issue together with an optimistic attitude.
These positive experiences produce good neural connections into your child's brain and form the memories individuals your child carries for life.
With regards to discipline, it seems difficult to remain positive, especially when dealing with behavior problems. But it's possible by using positive discipline and avoiding harsh discipline.
Being a great parent means you need to teach your child the morals of what's right and what is wrong.
Setting limits and being constant will be the golden rule to good discipline. Be firm and kind whenever you set rules and implement them. Concentrate on the reason behind the child's misbehavior. And make it a chance for them to find out for the future in a positive way, instead of to get penalized for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR YOUR CHILD
Let the child of yours realize that you'll always be there for them if it is responsive to your child's signals and vulnerable to their needs. Support and accept your child as an individual. Be a safe and warm place for the child of yours to explore from and return to.
Children raised by parents who are constantly responsive have better emotional regulation development, social skills development, and emotional health outcomes.
#5: Talk with The CHILD of yours And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Many of us already know the importance of communication. Talk to your child as well as listen to them thoroughly. By maintaining an open line of communication, you will have a much better relationship with your child and your child will come to you when there's an issue.
But there is an additional reason for communication. You help your kid integrate various parts of the brain of theirs, a crucial process in a kid's development.
Integration is similar to our body, in which different organs must coordinate and work together to maintain a healthy body. When different parts of the brain are incorporated, they are able to work harmoniously as an entire, meaning less tantrums, much more good behavior, much more empathy, and much better psychological well-being.
To accomplish that, talk through troubling experiences. Ask your child to https://parentinghowto.com/ describe what happened and how they felt to develop attuned communication.
You don't need to offer solutions. You do not have to have all of the answers to be a good parent. Just listening to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using words that are simple are going to help them make sense of the experiences of theirs and integrate the memories of theirs.
#6: Reflect on Your own personal CHILDHOOD
A lot of us want to parent differently from our parents. Even those who had an excellent upbringing and a thankful childhood might want to change several elements of how they were brought up.
But really frequently, when we open the mouths of ours, we speak just like our own parents did.
Reflecting on the own childhood of ours is an action towards understanding why we parent the way we do. Make note of things you would like changing and think of how you'd get it done differently in a real scenario. Try to be aware and change the behavior of yours the next time those issues come up.
Don't quit if you do not succeed in the beginning. It takes practice, lots of practice to consciously alter one 's child-rearing methods.
#7: Pay attention to Your personal WELL-BEING
Parents need relief also.
Give consideration to your own well-being to avoid parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things including your own needs or maybe the health of your marriage are placed on the back burner when a child is born. When you don't take note of them, they are going to become bigger problems down the road. Make time to strengthen the relationship of yours with your spouse.
Stressed-out parents tend to be more prone to fighting. Do not be afraid to ask for parenting assistance. Having some "me time" for self care and stress management is important to revitalize the mind.
How parents take care of their child mentally and physically will make an impact in their parenting and family life. In case these two areas fail, your child is going to suffer, also.
#8: Do not SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
No doubt, for some parents, spanking can bring about short term compliance which sometimes is a much needed relief for the parents.
However, this method does not teach the child right from wrong. It simply teaches the kid to fear external consequences. The kid will be motivated to avoid getting caught with behavior that is inappropriate.
Spanking your child is modeling to the kid that he/she can resolve issues by violence. A child who is spanked, smacked, or maybe hit is more prone to fighting along with other children. They're more apt in order to become bullies and to use verbal/physical aggression to solve disputes.
Later in daily life, they're also far more apt to result in delinquency and oppositional behavior, even worse parent-child relationships, mental health problems, along with domestic violence victims or even abusers.
There are a variety of more effective options to discipline that have been proven to be more effective, like good discipline (Tip #3 above ) and positive reinforcement.
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What is your goal in increasing a kid?
When you are like most parents, you want your child to do well in college, be prosperous, be independent and responsible, be respectful, enjoy good associations with you and others, be caring and compassionate, and have a happy, healthy and fulfilling life.
But how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
If you are like the majority of parents, you most likely spend the majority of the time simply attempting getting through the day. As authors, Bryson and Siegel, point out in the book of theirs, The Whole Brain kid, rather than helping your kid thrive, spent most of time simply attempting to survive!
To not allow the survival mode dominate your life, next time you feel frustrated or angry, step back. Consider what frustration and anger will do for you or your child.
Instead, look for ways to turn every negative experience right into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums can be turned into priceless brain sculpting moments in case you focus on teaching your child, not attempting to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT Through the use of Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I don't mean shortchanging your child with tricks. What I mean is to take advantage of what's currently known by scientists.
To parent is one of the most researched fields in psychology. Many parenting techniques, traditions, or practices were scientifically researched, refined, verified, or refuted.
For best parenting advice for raising a kid and info that are backed by science, here is one of my personal favorite science based parenting books, The Science of Parenting.
Making use of scientific knowledge is of course not a one-size-fits-all approach. Every child is different. Even within the best parenting style, there are able to be a variety of effective parenting methods you could choose according to your child's temperament.
A good example is employing spanking to discipline. There are many better alternatives, time-in, reasoning, e.g. redirection, etc. You are able to choose a non-punitive discipline method that actually works ideal for your child.
Naturally, you can additionally decide to use "traditional" or maybe "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or spanking) and also may nonetheless buy a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has shown us that kids with different temperaments respond to the quality of parenting differently.
Those who are more vulnerable to parenting quality is going to have better outcomes under great parenting but worse outcomes under poor parenting.
Those who are much less susceptible may "turn out fine" regardless of how tough their parents treat them. Though it doesn't imply those practices are great. These children are merely fortunate. They can thrive despite poor parenting, not because of it.
Why take a possibility with sub-par parenting practices if you can use well-researched, better ones?
The value of parenting cannot be underestimated. Taking science based parental advice might not be the easiest way to parent. It might require more work on the part of yours in the short term but can save you lots of agony and time in the long run.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The great point is, that although parenting is hard, it's additionally very rewarding. The bad part will be the rewards usually come later than the hard work. But in case we try our best now, we'll eventually reap the rewards and also have absolutely nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!